Take a Walk Down a Vampire-Filled Memory Lane with Our Top 50 True Blood Moments
40. Andy Becomes a Father
Andy arrives at Merlotte’s with Maurella, who looks even more pregnant than before. Andy needs to talk to Holly, but before he leaves Maurella he brings her a box of salt, which she drains like it’s a Cajun margarita. Jane Bodehouse is at the bar (trust her to be at Merlotte’s as the world is falling apart … if she stays drunk enough, she’ll never notice what’s going on around her), and she asks Andy if they have ever had sex. This is bad timing for Andy, who is trying to talk to Holly to clear the air and rebuild their relationship. Andy explains that he cares for Holly more than anyone he has ever known. Holly wants to know how many times he has seen Maurella, and as he starts to explain, Maurella screams. Her “light” broke. She’s going into labor.
Holly jumps into action and acts as a midwife as Maurella’s labor hits her hard. The odd thing is that her labor sounds more like an orgasm than hard labor. “Who knew watching an alien give birth could be so comforting?” Arlene muses. Lafayette sips his drink beside her. The weird stuff is always the best to watch, he points out.
Through it all, Maurella is quite calm — this is her 73rd pregnancy, after all. She hits a very high, very long note, and out pops a healthy baby girl, sans umbilical cord. Holly hands the baby to Andy, who beams like a proud papa even though the circumstances aren’t exactly normal. Holly turns back to Maurella, her eyes wide. Hold it — they’re not done.
Arlene and Jane watch the births as if they’re at the Bon Temps High School football game. It’s like a spectator sport. There’s something interesting about Maurella’s moaning, though. Arlene sagely tells Jane that giving birth isn’t like that for normal red-blooded humans. After the fourth baby is delivered — another girl — Maurella sits up, smoothes her dress back over her once-again perfect form, and then she tells Andy that it’s his job to raise the girls, with the hope that at least half will make it to adulthood. Holly casts a stern look at Andy as he tries to grasp his new situation. “You’re a dick,” she tells him.
And that’s how Andy became a father of quads.