The Witcher season 1, episode 4 recap: Of Banquets, Bastards and Burials

In episode 4 of Netflix series The Witcher, Geralt acts as Jaskier’s bodyguard at a marriage ceremony of a cursed hedgehog man.

Previously on The Witcher, Yennefer (Anya Chalotra) underwent a mystical makeover ritual and The Witcher — Geralt of Rivia (Henry Cavill) — battled a cursed, incestuous creature.

Episode 4 begins with Princess “Ciri” Cirilla (Freya Allan) seemingly possessed and wandering into the woods. She is quickly confronted by a tribe, and her new companion, Dara (Wilson Radjou-Pujalte), seems to be hiding. Ciri cautiously lies to the tribe and says her name is “Fiona.” She is in a place called Brokilon Forest, and the tribe is Queen Eithne (Josette Simon) and the Dryads.

Eithne is obsessed with getting Ciri to drink the water in the forest and forget her past. Specifically, Ciri is told of Shan-Kayan. However, Ciri gets distracted by finding Dara with an arrow in his arm (ouch!). She then quietly confesses her Princess’ identity to Dara.

Elsewhere, a portion of Queen Calanthe (Jodhi May) is eaten by a magical seer, who is then himself gutted to magically trace Cirilla to Brokilon Forest (yes, it’s a very weird scene, and not exactly the most useful form of magic imaginable). Later, by the episode’s end, Ciri has a vision of a magical tree in the desert — which must be the legendary Shan-Kayan.

Geralt’s bodyguard gig

For new lyrical material, Jaskier the Bard (Joey Batey) listens to the story of a Witcher being swallowed by a Selkiemore. When he learns it’s Geralt of Rivia, Jaskier is assured that The Witcher in question survived. Sure enough, Geralt shows up covered in guts demanding what he’s owed.

After Geralt gets cleaned up, Jaskier promises him food, women, and wine if he’ll serve as his bodyguard at a wedding. Geralt reluctantly agrees, and it’s surprising he agrees at all. In fact, when he gets to the ceremony, Geralt tells Mousesack (Adam Levy), “I find royalty best taken in small doses.”

Mousesack confides that Queen Calanthe (who’s still alive in these scenes) refused his marriage proposal for being kicked in the whatchamacallit by an ox as a child (ouch!).

Geralt’s reminded why Jaskier wanted a bodyguard, as certain people in the kingdom want him dead for sleeping with their wives. It prompts Geralt to deliver a great line: “Try not to get any daggers in your back before dawn.”

There are a few surprising moments from The Witcher. He mentions how Filavandrel (Daniel Olbrychski) spared his life. It also becomes obvious that Queen Calanthe is attracted to him, and he almost seems tempted by her (although his sexuality and general interest in humans have been ambiguous). In any case, the real reason for the ceremony is for suitors for Princess Pavetta (Gaia Mondadori), who show up and get rejected in droves.

“Law of Surprise”

The Witcher then introduces an interesting character: Urcheon of Erlenwald/Duny (Bart Edwards). He shows up for Pavetta in a knight’s armor. However, when Calanthe has his helmet removed, he’s revealed to be a hedgehog man!

Being no fan of Sonic, Calanthe orders Geralt to kill the knight. Geralt refuses, saying the knight is cursed rather than truly monstrous. When Geralt saves Urcheon from other attackers, Calanthe commands they both be killed. When he gets a moment, Urcheon maintains that he saved King Roegner, then took the “Law of Surprise” as payment.

What is that, you may ask? It’s a convoluted principle that, if you save someone’s life from an unexpected danger, you are owed something great and equally unexpected. In this case, King Roegner’s surprise was the daughter of Calanthe!

Everyone urges Queen Calanthe to obey destiny’s law, including Princess Pavetta. In fact, even Geralt says that a promise must be obeyed. When Calanthe tries to cut Urcheon’s throat, Pavetta lets out a mighty, Ciri-like scream that works like a storm.  Calanthe finally says “Destiny has spoken and the Law of Surprise will be honored.”

With that, the hedgehog knight and Pavetta kiss, thus lifting the curse. There are a few more fun moments here, too. When telling Jaskier to avoid any more dalliances with married women, he says: “Don’t grope for trout in any peculiar rivers until dawn.” Also, he himself claims the Law of Surprise for his services at the ceremony. This leads Mousesack to lecture a skeptical Geralt about how destiny is not to be trifled with.

Yennefer’s terrible adventure

Finally, Queen Kalis of Lyria (Isobel Laidler) and Yennefer are attacked by a Ronin Mage assassin (Marcin Czarnik) and his strange, insectoid creature. Yennefer opens a portal to escape. However, he tracks them through the new desert-scape, and finds them in other portals they open up.

Queen Kalis is killed after offering her baby as a sacrifice. Yennefer escapes with the child. Unfortunately, though, the baby dies and Yennefer ends up burying it in beach sand. Boy, what a rough day!

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All episodes of The Witcher are currently available for streaming on Netflix.