Brooklyn Nine-Nine season 6 episode 1 recap: Honeymoon

After nine months and a move to NBC, Brooklyn Nine-Nine is back for its sixth season. The show picks up where it left off last year:  hanging on a cliff.

When we last saw the crew from Brooklyn Nine-Nine, they were on Fox. Jake (Andy Samberg) and Amy (Melissa Fumero) had just gotten married. Captain Holt (Andre Braugher) had just read a note that told him whether or not he had been promoted to commissioner. Well? Did he get the promotion?

Honeymoon was written by Neil Campbell (Comedy Bang! Bang!) and directed by Giovani Lampassi (Party Down). We find out if Captain Holt will be Commissioner Holt before the season-opening credits roll. Let’s recap! [Whoosh sound]

You Ready for This?

Yes! Captain Holt was selected to become the next Commissioner of the NYPD. Jake goes and gets a beatbox to pump up the jams. What a way to cap off a wedding. But then Captain Holt notices that the word ‘not’ is placed strategically in the note so that it actually reads ‘you have not been selected to become the next Commissioner of the NYPD.’ What a bummer. The job went to John Kelly (Alan Brooks).

Brooklyn Nine-Nine-Andre Braugher-Courtesy of Ben Gabbe/Getty Images

At the next roll call, Captain Holt is gone. Gina (Chelsea Peretti) states she’s in charge but is quickly pushed away by Terry (Terry Crews). He announces that Captain Holt is out sick. He feels about 49% healthy with an improvement rate of 8.6% per day. Rosa (Stephanie Beatriz) is not impressed.

Jake and Amy bust in with fists full of money. Amy scored money via wedding insurance, which meant that they could now go to Posadita Bonita, Mexico (#Gina30). Nothing is going to get in the way of their rest, relaxation, and relations.

Coconuts, Grapes, and a Pleasure Box

Jake and Amy arrive in Mexico. They’re both excited at the prospect of having sex outside of the United States of America. What a time to be alive! They can have any drink they want to be poured into a coconut. They can ask for grapes whenever they want and get grapes plus cheese. And they even got a free pleasure box, which comes in handy later on in the story.

This genuinely seems like it will be a lovely, romantic start to Jake and Amy’s marriage. That is until Amy notices Captain Holt sitting at the outside bar. But I thought he was out of work because he was sick?

Captain Holt is sick. He’s sick with sadness. After John Kelly announced that he would make it his priority to bring back the equivalent of Stop and Frisk as commissioner, Captain Holt lost his will to be a policeman. The next thing he knew he was on a plane to Mexico (#Gina30). Captain Holt didn’t even bring clothes, which led to him buying a pile of novelty tees. They included one that slut shames a pineapple for wearing a thong with a gangsta lean. But it’s in pastels, so, it’s marginally acceptable, I guess.

Most of Jake and Amy’s attempts at relaxation and romance are interrupted by the fact that Captain Holt is right there beside them. Captain Holt tries to play things off as best as he can, but he’s hurting.

Essential Bonnie Bedelia Cosplay

Jake and Amy devise a plan to include Captain Holt in all their activities one day in order to cheer him and make him realize that being commissioner isn’t everything. The only problem is, the plan works too well. As Captain Holt is savoring his time spent going over his itemized hotel bill (#Gina30), he tells Jake that he’s quitting the force.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine-Honeymoon-Courtesy of Mark Davis/Getty Images

Jake won’t let this ride. He takes Captain holt back to his room in order to lock him in and prevent him from leaving. Amy comes out of the bathroom dressed as Holly Gennaro McClane (Bonnie Bedelia) from Die Hard, Jake’s favorite movie. This was supposed to be for sexy time, but when Amy learns of Captain Holt’s plans to quit the force, she is upset, as well.

It’s a good thing that I’ve seen every episode of Karley Sciortino’s Slutever. I knew before Jake and Amy that there would be plenty of things in the complimentary pleasure box to tie Captain Holt to the bed with. Since the bed was covered in rose petals, it wasn’t uncomfortable.

Captain Holt is convinced to stay on the force. He will approach the mayor about John Kelly’s atrocious policy. The day is won! In the ensuing week, Amy cosplays as Bonnie Bedelia again while Jake cosplays as Melvil Dewey, the creator of the Dewey Decimal System. Aww. Captain Holt’s appeal to the mayor worked. Stop and Frisk is put on hold. But John Kelly retaliates by closing the first floor of Nine-Nine for remodeling. The entire precinct is not in the squad’s bullpen. Big harrumph.

Is the Password #Gina30?

In other story news, Rosa has been working a meth case for two months. Since the Department of Sanitation Police found evidence of a meth deal in the garbage, they want to take over the case. She goes to ranking squad member Terry. He’s given himself the nickname Top Dawg Terry because he gets things done quickly.

Top Dawg Terry’s advice for Rosa is to ignore the Sanitation Police request. But she’s done that already. In that case, Top Dawg Terry suggests she tell them that she won’t give the case up. Rosa has tried that as well. The Sanitation Police threatened to file a formal complaint if she did not comply.

He begins to look for a copy of a manual for replacements that Captain Holt was writing in case he got promoted to Commissioner. Top Dawg Terry can’t find it. When he realizes the manual is on Holt’s computer, he unsuccessfully tries to guess the password and bricks the computer. He tries to access it on the cloud, but the password for that has strange security questions associated with it.

Brooklyn-Nine-Nine-Honeymoon-Courtesy of Jerod Harris/Getty Images

Eventually, Gina reveals that she had a copy of the manual all along. Rosa gives it to Top Dog Terry. It has a passage telling his successor to trust Terry over everyone else because he always knows what to do. This gives Top Dawg Terry the confidence he needs to tell Rosa to suggest a joint investigation by Nine-Nine and the Sanitation Police.

#Gina30

Gina has a deal set up with the resort that Jake, Amy, and Captain Holt ended up honeymooning at. At checkout, you use code Gina30 for the 30% off. Who needs the Trivago Bro?!

Gina’s main plot for this episode involved her and Boyle (Joe Lo Truglio). Quick recap: Her mom is married to his dad. Suddenly, Gina’s mom wants a divorce. Boyle is upset. Gina is non-plussed.

In order to break into Gina’s phone, which is armed with facial recognition, Boyle wears a wig and puts on a rounded cardboard cutout mask of Gina. It doesn’t work but gets Gina to lunge at him. He takes advantage of Gina’s face in his face and aims the phone at her. It unlocks the phone. Boyle reads the text messages between Gina and her mom. Gina insists that her mom dumps Boyle’s dad. Welp!

In the breakroom, Gina sits with Boyle. She finds it easier to feel sorry for him if he wears the Gina mask, so he complies. First, we got rid of the Trivago Bro and now we dump Guy Fawkes. Awesome! Meanwhile, it turns out that Gina found out her mom was cheating on Boyle’s dad. Gina insisted she divorce him because of it. Boyle appreciates that.

Overall, this was a solid season and network opener. It tied up loose ends and set up arcs for the rest of the season. I can’t wait for next week’s episode.

Are you happy that Brooklyn Nine-Nine is back? Did you watch the season premiere? What did you think? Let’s discuss in the comments!