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Disenchantment season 1, episode 5 recap: ‘Faster, Princess! Kill! Kill!’

By Wade Wainio

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In episode 5 of Netflix original Disenchantment, Princess Bean gets hired as an executioner and things get dark when Elfo meets Hansel and Gretel.

“Faster, Princess! Kill! Kill!” begins with Princess Bean (Abbi Jacobson) facing certain punishment for events from the last episode on Disenchantment. If you don’t recall, it’s when she threw an outrageous party and the kingdom was almost overrun by Vikings. Now she’s forced into a convent called “Our Lady of Unlimited Chastity,” whose sign promises “Live Prude Girls.”

Bean is hardly living in luxury, though. Their soup of the day is hot dog water, and the nuns lead a chant of, “I am bad and you are bad and we are bad together/Humanity’s a wretched lot but God is slightly better.” Luckily for her, she gets kicked out for blasphemy – especially after they see her personal demon Luci’s (Eric Andre) tail peeking out from her dress!

When she’s returned to the Kingdom of Dreamland, she promises her father, King Zøg (John DiMaggio )that she’ll stop causing trouble. However, he banishes her from the castle ’til she can see how good she has it. While outside, she gets to experience the abject poverty of living with her servant, Bunty (Lucy Montgomery). How poor is she? Her place only has a door because a horse ate her walls! Obviously, Disenchantment has some serious poverty problems to contend with.

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Bean for Hire

Before long, Bean sets off to get a job and is told that minimum wage is two lashings per hour.
Unfortunately, she’s not good at being a sheepherder, a lighthouse keeper or a pet shop employee (where she mistakenly thinks she’s at a butcher shop). Ultimately, she is hired in a torture dungeon, by a frequently hooded brute (and seemingly nice guy) named Stan the Executioner (Noel Fielding).  In the dungeon, Bean meets a stereotypical cackling witch (Tress MacNeille).

Much to King Zøg’s delight, Bean is promoted to Executioner. He says, rather sentimentally,
“My little girl, all grown up and choppin’ heads! And all it took was some loving banishment.”
However, Bean disappoints her father yet again, as she can’t go through with the execution. This ends up being a big plot point, actually.

Executions are a form of entertainment in Dreamland, and there’s even money to be made selling things like blood ponchos. Bean risks becoming quite unpopular. Obviously, if everyone followed her example, it would be bad for the economy. Among the throng of spectators, a boy taunts, “Hey, choppa, choppa. Swing, choppa!” (It’s one of Disenchantment‘s funniest quotes so far, in one of it’s funniest episodes).

Elfo and Hansel and Gretel

Poor little Elfo is mistaken for a baby again, this time by Bunty! Elfo escapes, but Bunty pursues him until the trail runs cold. Later, the disheartened Princess Bean and Luci track Elfo down into the woods.  However, they don’t find him before he meets Hansel (David Herman) and Gretel (Tress MacNeille).

Enchanted by their tasty candy house, they have no problem enticing him inside, where they devilishly try to fatten him up – offering a new spin on an old classic. In fact, Elfo does much of the work for them. He even sleeps in a pan and butters himself up so he won’t stick! They then rather casually put him in the oven, presumably ’til he’s golden brown.

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Soon, Bean and Luci track Elfo down, and they are greeted with open arms (and greedy stomachs): “Come on in, make yourself casserole…I mean, comfortable,” they are told. Bean is offered a meal fresh out of the oven. After trying a leg she says, “I like this, but as a friend,” hinting it may be Elfo. Fortunately, it’s not, but they find out that Elfo is on the menu.

As chaos ensues, Bean and the others end up in Hansel & Gretel’s hellish basement, where candy and carnage meet as one. However, as one might expect, Hansel and Gretel are defeated and the house demolished (in true action movie style, they coolly walk away from the explosion without looking back).  Later, Bean convinces Dreamland to free the Witch, who had only adopted Hansel and Gretel. Unfortunately, they had destroyed her home, but isn’t that the way the cookie crumbles?

That’s it for this Disenchantment recap! What are your thoughts? Let us know in the comments!

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